The Carb Slippy-Slide

Sigh.

I have to remember that gurus of change remind mere mortals that "if at first you don't succeed, try, try again". When you steer off course, when you fall off the wagon, when you mess up.....forgive yourself and get back on track.  So, I did and didn't feel too bad about screwing up this Day 5 of my low(er) carb diet. 

Today I scrimped on breakfast because after eating eggs every day (there's nothing else on the menu for the first 2 weeks), the appeal wears off. So, I downed a glass of tomato juice and a mozzarella cheese stick on the way out the door. Halfway to work I started feeling jittery and weak, sort of hypoglycemic.An overwhelming hunger, deep down in my bones begged for begged for carbs. Feeling tired and dizzy, my climb up a flight of stairs to the office left my legs wobbly and my lungs winded. Jeeeez. That's bad. 

I rationalized that something had to be done quickly, "main-lined" to get the job done, to pump me up for the ten patients on my morning schedule. Rocket fuel, please.

 

This little devil  (and several more of the same) were in the bottom drawer of my desk. I downed those 4 vanilla cookies in less than a minute and it wasn't more than 15 minutes before I felt considerably better. Calm, cool, collected.....and guilty. But, not guilty enough.

The problem with a slip is the overwhelming temptation to slip again because, well....hell, the day is trashed anyway. That was me when the clinic served up an enormous chocolate cake, a tasty goodbye treat to honor a colleague who was leaving. That was right around noon. No control at all. Gone. And, oh my God, that cake tasted damn good. My only regret was inhaling rather than savoring the delicious blast of raw sugar heaven.

So what? I'll get back on track. Things are going well overall and I'm determined to quell my carb frenzy with healthier foods. A week ago, I'd have been eating this kind of stuff every day, all day.