Oh, God, Hon....

My Birthday began and ended with a telephone call from my daughter.

5:45 AM: "Happy Birthday, Mom!" Then, she sang to me. What's not to love (even at 5:45 AM when she is up in order to be on  the job by 7 AM). Sweet. I managed to fall back asleep for another hour.

All good.

Then, after a lovely dinner and a few glasses of wine at home I was ready to call it a day. Lying in bed, lights out around 9:30 PM my phone buzzes. She's calling again.

"How was your Birthday, Mom?"

"Really good." (and I share with her some of the highlights)

"Guess what.....?  I have a new fish tank and five new fish."

"Whaaaat? What happened to the old tank?"

"I still have the old tank. The new one is a twenty gallon and there's a little scuba diver that goes all around the tank."

"Why are you doing this?  Why are you buying all this STUFF? Why are you getting all this STUFF that you have to take care of?"

no answer

"Mom, the worst was when I brought the tank home and put it on top of Kate's (roommate) bookcase in the living room. The weight of the tank broke the bookcase and the fish spilled out EVERYWHERE."

"Oh, God."

"Yeah, and I freaked out and tried to save the fish and clean up the mess. I saved three of the fish."

"Oh, God."

"Petco gave me new fish when I explained what happened. They never told me I needed to buy a special stand to hold the weight of the tank."

"Oh, God."

"Kate's bookcase got ruined and I need to buy her a new one but that's no big deal. She's not upset. The bookcase was only like thirty bucks."

"So now you have two tanks of fish? Why are you doing this? I don't get it, Hon. You'll never be able to leave. Ever. You're tying yourself down."

"Mom, you don't realize that I've turned into a 'home-body'. I literally stay home now. I don't go out much. I grow plants now. I have a pots with vegetables growing outside."

"Oh, God."

"Haven't you ever heard of a fish ball, Mom?  It's this thing you put in the tank to feed the fish when you're away for awhile."

"What about the guinea pig?  Why are you doing this? Why are you getting more and more stuff to tie you down?"

"Mom, it's a hobby. They make me happy."

"Oh, God."

"I also bought a beta fish today."

"What???? A third tank?"

"No, the beta is just in a regular fish bowl."

"Oh, God."  I can't talk anymore.

"Ok, Bye."

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Oh God Oh God Oh God Oh God.